No Regrets

In my high school year I remember in my poetry class or was it Literature?
I remember this girl reciting the poem that she found interesting. I tried to find it online but to no avail.
It was about a woman who had her thoughts constantly in the past, regretting, and just a downright sad poem I held in my memory. I don’t exactly know what this woman’s age was but it went something like this: This woman was 30 years old but wished to be 20 again, when she approached 40 she wanted to be 30 again, and when she reached 50 she wanted to be 40 again…and so on.

So here I am reflecting on that poem and its messages. When I was 18 I wanted to be 21. I imagined a great change for myself. A sophisticated confident woman. I have reached my 21 years of age and I am exactly the same as I was 4 years ago. Maybe a bit more knowledgeable and wiser. I still feel like a little girl though.

And now…now that I have reached my ideal age, I am constantly thinking…”This is it? Now what? Why haven’t I changed?”

To change one’s life, start immediately,
do it flamboyantly, NO exceptions.

–William James

I have been waiting to change. Waiting does not get you anywhere does it? I have been waiting for 4 years so that I can magically become a more sophisticated confident woman. Waiting led me nowhere where I wanted to be.

If I wanted to change, there is always a “—but…”
Or, “I will start tomorrow”. Then, “I will start next week”. And finally, “I just don’t have the time!”

I don’t want to regret my life like the woman in the poem. I want to be happy as I get older and accept that I am getting older. I always felt that there was a restriction in my case though. The fact that I have to deal with my past before I can change and move on. Because of this belief, this belief is probably the main reason why I was not willing to change. I didn’t want to deal with my past. But I have started reading this wonderful book.

The How of Happiness, by Sonja Lyubomirsky:

“…achieving lasting happiness does not necessarily require, as a psychotherapist might tell you, digging deep into your childhood, psychoanalyzing your past traumatic experiences, or dissecting your habitual ways of relating to others.”

When I was dealing with God back then [I don't believe in God], I was told to forgive and accept my past. Same meaning as dealing with my past. Why restrict myself? There is no manual out there that says I have to follow this and this to be on the path for happiness and change. People who say these things, who really do not have the experience of a traumatic past, are not only ignorant, THEY are restricting YOU, not necessarily our past that is restricting us.

So here’s the good news: past is the past, what is this meaning of accepting it? In accordance to my life specifically?
As Buddha’s principles, focus on the present and move forward.

Yeah…only if it were that easy huh? Well…

Now I don’t have any more reasons to complain. All this time I was complaining: “Because of my past I am like this, because of my past I can’t do that, because of my past I am incapable of moving forward, because of my past I am what I am…”

Complaining, blaming, and waiting led me nowhere.

I am glad that I realize that now. It is just a matter of refining this new found wisdom.
I find it very interesting how, the older I get, or the wiser I get?, the less significant my past seems to be.
I wonder why that is?

Either way, I am glad that my past no longer has the stronger hold on me.

 

Charlie Chaplin Quotes

These quotes were inspiring. Thought I’d post it up.
They are all by Charlie Chaplin. That comedian actor famous for his silent films.

Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of yourself.

We all make mistake. It can happen. Now I just need a hell of a lot more courage to take a chance.

Nothing is permanent in this wicked world – not even our troubles.

Absolutely. We don’t live forever. So don’t make things so complicated. ..Yeah..Got it. I will try harder.

The saddest thing I can imagine is to get used to luxury.

I heard this on the radio. I liked it. Which prompted me to search for Charlie Chaplin. A message that says, “Don’t focus on too much materialistic things.” Which I tend to do a lot. So, after luxury, what is there? Don’t we all strive for luxury? Isn’t that one of our goal? So once we have it…what then? Right? Yeah I agree. Getting used to luxury can be sad.

To help a friend in need is easy, but to give him your time is not always opportune.

I also heard this on the radio. It is so true. In my case it is. It’s really hard to get out and meet a friend for me. Either because I am too lazy to go out [most likely] or time issue [yeah right]…

After all, I am a bit antisocial.

What do you want a meaning for? Life is a desire, not a meaning.

Now THIS. Is. Brilliant. Quote. Bravo! We don’t need a meaning to live. That’s depending on something/someone to just live. And don’t we strive for independence? But than I suppose this quote can go two ways.

To have a desire, don’t we need a meaning? I may eat my words later. But I am happy to be reminded that we don’t HAVE to have a meaning in this life. Just live.

Sometimes I feel like something is in my head that will finally free me of constantly searching for something missing. Which ultimately leads to sadness and unhappiness. If we are still searching for something, doesn’t that mean we are still unsatisfied?

But its there in my head. Like an answer waiting to be found. But I can’t quite catch it. I sort of understand what it means to be happy. If I can just decipher that hidden message in my head. I think that is when I can finally understand what happiness is all about. I’m not even sure if that hidden message is about happiness. Quotes or meaningful phrases and sentences trigger that “Oh it’s there, it’s there…..gone” response in my head…

 

A New Philosophy Added

Philosophy #1: Holistic approach to health and skin care.

And Now:

Philosophy #2: Live life simply.

I got inspired by my calendar. Ha, my calendar. :)
Had some what I consider, soul-deep quotes which I displayed to your right. Inspiring.

Sometimes I have felt something was wrong in my life. It was too simple. Had me questioning, “Is this what life is about?” I kept expecting something big to happen. Waiting for something to happen. But waiting doesn’t get you anywhere right?

I had those times where I thought I had to live my life chaotically to be considered that I “have a life.” I thought I had to have a lot of events filled in my life to feel fulfilled and have meaning in life.

I have always tried to approach life simply but somehow I get the impression, that anything “simple” is looked down upon in our society. Considered lazy, have no life, anti-social, and just plain boring? So I backed down and kept that “busy” frame of work, while getting no where, confused, unsure, feeling down, and somehow, unconsciously searching for something that felt missing.

But these quotes opened my eyes and widened my horizon a bit.
Who told me how to live my life right?

In this society, we are easily influenced by those around us. That is just a common fact isn’t it?
I suppose I got too sucked into what everyone else expected in life. Probably still am, but I am slowly learning.

Simple is like in the middle of easy and complicated.

Anything too extreme or too much is always bad for you.
Even too much happiness is bad. That’s a shocker isn’t it? It took a while for that one to finally be accepted.

So in conclusion, I will approach life simply.
“A confused mind, says no.” ~ My math teacher… he says it’s a salesperson Adage. :D

All the words that dealt with “simple” has been taken (go figure). Simplic is a shorten version of simplicity. Simplic still sounds sophisticated! :)

 

Becoming a Creative Genius

This is an interesting excerpt from my psychology book…if you are interested.
I found this to be amusing, curious, motivating, daunting, and inspirational. It might sound a bit intimidating at first, but once you get used to this notion, you feel more comfortable with it. At least I did.

Creative people tend to share these 5 common personality traits:

Independence: Highly creative people have the ability to resist social pressures to conform to conventional ways of thinking, at least in their area of creative interest. That is, they have the confidence to strike out on their own. Because of this, perhaps, some creative people describe themselves as loners.

Intense interest in a problem: Highly creative individuals also must have an all-consuming interest in the subject matter with which they will be creative. They are always tinkering, often just in their minds, with problems that fascinate them. External motivators, such as money or a Nobel Prize, may add to their motivation, but the main motivators are internal, otherwise they could not sustain the long-term interest in a problem necessary for an original contribution.

Willingness to restructure the problem: Highly creative people not only grapple with problems, but they often question the way a problem is presented. For example, students from the School of the Art Institute of Chicago who later became the most successful creative artists amount their class members had one striking characteristic in common: They were always changing and redefining the assignments given by their instructors.

Preference for complexity: Creative people seem drawn to complexity–to what may appear messy or chaotic to others. Moreover, they revel in the challenge of looking for simplicity in complexity. Thus, highly creative people may be attracted to the largest, most difficult, and most complex problems in their fields.

A need for stimulating interaction: Creativity of the highest order almost always grows out of an interaction of highly creative individuals. Early in their careers, creative people usually find a mentor–a teacher who brings them up to speed in their chosen field. Highly creative individuals go on to surpass their mentors and then find additional stimulation from the ideas of others like themselves. Often, this means leaving behind family and former friends.

In other words, many people who have studied these traits agree on two MAIN points.
Ladies and gentleman the “formula for becoming a creative genius” is:

First, creativity requires well-developed knowledge of the field in which the creative contribution will be made. [It takes 10 years to become a expert on a chosen field]

Second, high-level creativity requires certain personal characteristics, such as independence and the motivation required to sustain an interest in an unsolved problem over a very long period of time.

Just in case you have not caught on, I will repeat. That path to becoming highly creative first requires that you be an “expert” on your chosen field. The book listed “Whether it be skiing, sculpture, singing, or psychology.” I liked how the author listed fields that were…not what you expect to become a genius in. Makes it that much less discouraging doesn’t it? My point: You can become a creative genius in ANY field.

Now back to becoming an expert. Experts are those who possess extensive knowledge of their chosen field. According to the book, researchers say it takes up to at least 10 years to master your chosen field. And just like the last excerpt up above, the rest are HIGH motivation to keep you going. You have to LOVE your field. 10 years of intense studying. “Intense training and practicing.”

What produces extraordinary creativity, is extensive knowledge, high motivation, and certain personality characteristics—NOT superhuman talents. [Weisberg]

To prevent your creative flow from ebbing, you need the right environment. A Supportive Environment. Stay away from people who discourage you or put pressure…such as ..MY.. parents. Ha.

I am not personally interested in becoming the next genius of my generation. But I do want to be an expert on my chosen field. That is what really caught my attention. Just what kind of drive I need to be successful in my field? Not too extensive to go as far to mold myself completely to become like these personality traits, but to change my attitude I suppose. Or to get an idea. So far the words “intense studying and high motivation and dedication” is all I needed to read. Common sense, but a good reminder.

I have 10 years to go! And further as my chosen field is a ever changing one as the years go by…er and probably everything else. Nothing not changes right? According to Buddha, change is why we find things precious and beautiful. If you apply this thinking to everything, it is very sad, but at the same time it’s true…

Its not nearly as sad as I first thought. You could say I have gotten over my shock. :)

All excerpts and sources from:
Psychology Core Concepts, Sixth Edition, Chapter 5: Thinking and Intelligence.
Philip G. Zimbardo, Robert L. Johnson, and Vivian McCann.

 

What is true conscientiousness?

I did a bit of thinking of what it means to be truthfully conscientious.
What it means to live a life that brings no harm to the people and environment.

Just trying to THINK about being environmentally friendly creates a lot of turmoil inside of me. My developing favorite art hobby is creating crafts out of polymer clay. And guess what polymer clay is made out of?

PVC. Polyvinyl Chloride. Plastic #3. Plastic.

I made such a big deal out of plastic a few months ago. I even bought my whole family Klean Kanteen, a stainless steel reusable water bottle, knowing the harmful effects that plastic does to us. And now, must I give up my hobby?

It feels as though I have to question and scrutinize everything that I use and own. Is this good for the environment? Is there another alternative? What can I do to minimize harm? And than I find it is entirely bad for your health anyhow. I haven’t gotten far as to think about my actions toward the environment.

Today I thought, why is being eco-friendly so hard? ..Because I don’t want to give up the easy comfort that comes with a price, a price that ultimately destroys the very place that comfort things are created, the earth. Which gets me to think about something that has been nagging me in my unconscious mind… If you are faithfully and passionately religious please read no further. This is me being very opinionated and judgmental with a whole lot of skepticism.

There are many passionate religious people out there. They are very kind and gentle, especially the “teacher” of religion, who guides you in religion, may that be a pope or a pastor. These leaders dedicate themselves to God. They love God so much that they want to help spread the word and teach other people about Jesus. The kind and giving Jesus. Church goers are the same. They help other people out with charity and go on missions to spread the Gospel and help out the needy. Reach out to the lost ones. They proclaim themselves as followers of God. Yes, I can see how passionate they are. I acknowledge their kind hearts.

And when I observe people who sing their hearts out for their savior; when I observe people who pray so passionately that their foreheads are wrinkled or have tears running down their faces…

There is something I really don’t get among other things. There was always something about religion and churches that struck me as odd.

These people say they love God and yet they are ignorant and trash the earth.

I find it very funny. Do they REALLY love God?
Do they just not know? Or are they pretending to be ignorant?
No, they know. Global warming is a huge issue. They KNOW.

Isn’t part of loving God loving the earth? The very place that God himself created? There are so many pictures in religion where they relate it to the beauty of nature and yet they themselves remain ignorant and trash it? Seriously?

I seriously don’t understand all the hype of religion. Believe in God! Be saved! Be saved? From what? From the death that will consume our young lives from the pollution that we ourselves have created? How about the future generation? [being irrationally sarcastic]

And people get angry because of natural disasters?! They blame God? Religion is becoming increasingly hypocritical and corrupted. Why go to mission and save people? If our earth is sick, were going to die anyhow. [again sarcasm]

I would rather see missions to teach people some reality, about how much harm were doing to Gods earth and teach how they can become environmentally friendly AND at the same time teach about God.

I am not just targeting religious people nor am I saying that EVERYONE is ignorant, but I would think, or seriously you’d THINK, that with the global warming, and considering how faithful they are to their God, that religious groups would come together to create a campaign to save the earth! The earth that God has created for us! A huge MAJOR campaign. A major EVENT. JUST like proposition 8. You’d think right?

Come on. They are not being unknowingly ignorant. Global warming is a hot issue. Look at the odd weather were having.

Surely they KNOW that God has created earth? It’s in the very first chapters of the BIBLE. IF they are truly religious, you’d think the religious people would truly CARE for the earth? The earth in which HE created for us to live in… HE is the creator of our beautiful oceans and flowers and trees that we admire and love…And yet people spend their time and money on campaigns that go against homosexual marriages! And they preach to US? They preach to SAVE us? Whose going to save us from our dying earth which is from our OWN doing? God? Okay so we finally realize what we have done, so lets just blame that on Sin and hope that God forgives us and..Oh GOD! Save us!

With my observations I conclude that God is NOT happy! Global warming ring a bell? Why not take the Natural Disasters as a sign? Churches connect special events such as the horrible Natzi period to other things…why not make the connection with the natural disasters. Ha, I would take this warning to heart. Shouldn’t this be a BIGGER issue? A major outcry? How stupid can people get? Proposition 8. What ridiculous idiocy.

Is this how you show your faith in God?

But who am I to say this is wrong? What is really wrong or right? I have been reading more about Buddhism. If we are to label as something “right” than there is something “wrong” about that as well. I favor Buddhism in this. Although however harsh the Buddhism may sound, Buddhism is really all about seeing the Truth. Reality. Reality IS painful. But if we keep running away from it, that pain will always follow. I kind of see religion in this way sometimes. Blame on Sin for our mistakes. Ask God for answers even though all we really need to do is acknowledge the truth. Which is hard. So we place our burden in God.

Of all my experience in religion. I come to this conclusion. I believe Religion is hypocrisy for all that pastors and people alike preach and preach and preach and preach…and don’t have a care for earth.
Lets all look at the description of “hypocrisy”:

a pretense of having a virtuous character, moral or religious beliefs or principles, etc., that one does not really possess.

And look at how you live.
Do you really love God?
Are you going to keep on blaming it on Sin?
Why trash his Earth?
Earth is HIS after all right?

Welcome to reality.

What does it mean to be truly virtuous?

I am not supporting Buddhism nor am I a believer in God.